KC hit on this briefly in her "Consumer Diet" diary, but seeing as though it's been weighing on my mind lately, I thought I'd expound a little- I’m worried about the example I’m setting for my kid. I will admit the typical "won't someone PLEASE think of the children" bodice clutching that a lot of adults engage in is a huge pet peeve of mine, and I think that over-sanitizing a child's world by eliminating anything remotely bad, non-educational, or Adult does more harm than good. But lately... ugh.

Lily’s almost 2 now, so mimicking is in full force. I crack up when she tries to put on makeup, and I indulge her chap stick obsession. I like that she jams to a lot of different music and how she picks up her purse, keys and says “bye, goin’ to my car”. I even thought it was pretty darn funny when she repeated the f-word right back at me-I am a big believer in teaching kids, when they are older, that there are adult words and kid words. Nothing makes me crazier than when my niece tells me I can’t say a word like “stupid”- I can say whatever I want kid. Damn.

But there are other habits that I’m not so happy to see reflected back my way.

Here's some crazy crap for you: According to a new documentary film making its way through politically conservative circles, there's an ominous decline in childbirth rates around the world such that if we all don't start procreating fast, armageddon is surely afoot. The movie is called "Demographic Winter: Decline of the Human Family." This is from the promo web site:

Almost all of the developed countries of the world are now experiencing fertility rates far below replacement levels. Birthrates have fallen so low that even immigration cannot replace declining populations, and this migration is sapping strength from developing countries, the fertility rates for many of which are now falling at a faster pace than did those of the developed countries.

According to the film makers, this decline in human reproduction will lead to failed economies and social mayhem.

Huh? Whatever, I'm not in least bit concerned about this. But I write about it here because of a discussion it raised on this post on Reason Magazine.

The Reason writer wonders if the reason people aren't having more kids is because parenting ain't all that much fun.

Demographic Winter asserts that "every aspect of modernity works against family life and in favor of singleness and small families or voluntary childlessness." And surely they are right. Modern societies offer people many other satisfactions and choices outside of the family. In particular women find that their time becomes more highly valued in occupations outside the home.

In light of this children have become "consumption items to be enjoyed for their own sakes, more akin to sculptures, paintings, or theatre," he says. "But that's just the problem—according to happiness researchers, people don't really enjoy rearing children."

Yesterday I wrote a diary on the NYT article discussing single sex public education alternatives.  I just had a chance to follow-up and read all of the comments and am still mulling the thoughts over. Thanks to everyone who shared!

To me there is no topic more important than education. My parents were big on education and I was blessed with a fabulous one so I am already finding it all too easy to stress out about how to provide an education for Campbell.

There was a fabulously interesting article in the NYT Magazine yesterday about a ground swell of support for gender segregation in public school classrooms.  I have to admit this was a concept I'd never really considered and would have probably dismissed without thought before reading the article.  But the article's citation of studies showing that girls and boys learn differently has left me curious - though not fully converted.

The pregnancy is about to be over.

The last few months, I started to wonder if this day would arrive. But it will, at last. I have the credit card charges and airline and hotel reservations to prove it. On Monday morning, my son and I are off to Guatemala to get his sister. My mother is coming along to entertain him while I sit with my daughter on Tuesday morning in the US Embassy with the huge stack of papers waiting for her visa interview.

While we are waiting the day and a half for the Embassy to approve the visa application (yes, they could deny the visa; but there is no reason for them to do that in the paperwork. Knock wood anyway. Boy, have I gotten superstitious during this experience!), I am hoping we can visit Antigua for few hours and stroll around Zona Viva in Guatemala City, and visit with my son's foster mother at the hotel. Yeah, it's probably too much. We'll be back by the end of the week.

I know from my son's adoption, when I get back I'll be exhausted and a bit disoriented at first. A little sad. I'm already a little weepy at the smallest, sentimental things these days. The pregnancy is over. But joyful at the sight of my little girl at home with us. And, so grateful for the support of this community, friends, and family during this long journey. From what my friends who gave birth have told me, it's like that for them. Same but different.

While I cannot find the link, I do recall us discussing how to handle charities that continuously send fundraising letters -- even after they have exhausted any money we have sent them.

But what would you do if that perpetual fundraiser is an adorable niece or next-door neighbor? One writer to Parenting wondered the same thing:

My niece always hits me up for her school fundraisers. My kids don’t solicit family members this much. How can I get it to stop?

Parenting contributor Denene Millner offered two pieces of advice. The first one I thought was rather harsh:

Look, I want to help out, and I’m sure you do, too. But that doesn’t mean you’ve got to pull out the checkbook every time your niece opens her backpack. You could start by practicing the fine art of saying "No, thanks." Nobody said you have to buy the goods, even if the seller is your sister’s child. This won’t be easy, and may not go over well with your sister. But it sounds like you may need to be hard-line to keep your sanity.

Because my parents did not have much money, I had to go door-to-door to sell raffle tickets and chocolate bars for my Catholic school in Miami. To this day, I always buy from children who knock on my door, regardless of cause.

But I do realize that not everyone has the resources to continuously answer that call especially since even public schools have to rely on fundraisers to keep their doors open.

Even my own household has some (unspoken) ground rules when it comes to school fundraisers. While DH and I purchase the bulk of raffle tickets for Ari’s school, we sell only to our family, some neighbors -- the ones on our street -- and closest friends. In return, we buy things from our neighbors’ and friends’ children, which leads me to Millner’s second -- and sensible -- piece of advice:

As you probably already know, Sen. Barack Obama won the Virginia, Maryland and D.C. primaries yesterday by comfortable double-digit margins, according to CNN. He made significant inroads among white rural voters, Latinos and women, propelling him to the lead in the delegate count, even with Super Delegates taken into consideration.

Nonetheless, he has only slightly more than half the delegates needed to clinch the nomination. Damn, running for president is a grueling process. Then again, it is great we are making the candidates earn each and every single vote this campaign season.

Take That Ann Landers! Child-free movement websites such as this one often cite a 1970s study by Ann Landers that showed 70 percent of parents were unhappy and regretted having children. But Parenting -- not to be confused with Parents --  recently released an admittedly unscientific study that more than 80 percent of its readers would have had their children and even have had them earlier.

Here are the results of the magazine’s online poll:

If you had to do it over again:
59% would have had kids exactly when you did
23% would have had them earlier
16% would have had them later
2% would not have become a mom at all

Valentine’s Day Downer: Parenting magazine also released a poll showing that 69 percent of its readers dreaded traveling with their husbands more than their children. Ouch.

J-Lo Gossip: Okay, I am so behind on my celebrity gossip that I did not realize Jennifer Lopez was due to have twins tomorrow! Also, rumor has it her twins -- a boy and a girl -- will be named Max and Emme, according to Latina magazine.

What else is on your minds, MotherTalkers?

In light of the hype surrounding the movie Juno, here is one teen mom's perspective. Thanks for posting, MaggieFrances! -Elisa

Sitting here wondering where to begin when my 4 year old daughter, Lilith, walks in and says "Mama, I have something for you to make you feel better" (I have been sick for the past few days) she then puts an imaginary bandaid on my forehead and skips out of the room. I can't help but laugh to myself. She is too cute- looks nothing like me, actually the complete opposite, with her long stringy blond hair, fair skin, and blue eyes. I remember when she was born like it was yesterday. They handed her to me weighing only 5lbs 12oz with the biggest feet I have ever seen on something so small. She cuddled up to me and I was hers forever.
I can't help but remember those few days with a pang of sadness, though. The months leading up to that day were filled with pressure, whispers, dirty looks, and opinions we didn't need to hear. Instead of being supported and people rejoicing for us we were looked down on and lectured. Why? Because we were 17.

Cross-posted at Fussbucket

Get ready to feel guilty. Or smug. A report released a couple months ago from the UCLA Center for Healthier Children, Families, and Communities found that less than half of  parents aren't reading enough to their young children.

For children, early exposure to books -- including being read to aloud each day -- is critical for long-term academic success. Research has shown that up to one-third of American children enter kindergarten underprepared to learn, mostly because their early years leave them without the necessary language and literacy skills.

According to an executive summary of the report, called "Reading Across the Nation, A Chartbook," reading aloud is the single most important activity for building the knowledge required for reading success later on.

A news article from McClatchy Newspapers (which I can't find an online link to, sorry), says the survey found that parents typically read the least to children under age one, the most to children who are three years old, and less so when kids turn four or five.

"Maybe some children at 5 are starting to read themselves," says Shirley Russ, associate clinical professor of pediatrics at UCLA who is one of the lead authors of the study. "I'd encourage parents to keep up the reading at ages 4 and 5." One reason, she said, is that "parents can read to children with much richer language than children are initially capable of reading to themselves."

While nearly any kind of reading aloud offers some benefit, child-development experts are increasingly recognizing the value of "dialogic reading." This involves bringing children more actively into the process by having them point to certain items in the pictures, asking them questions about what might be coming up next, or encouraging them to think about how the book might relate to their own lives.

I was looking around at different news articles this morning while the kids watched the Rose parade, and I found this little gem on CNN.com.

http://www.cnn.com/...

It's about parents who have a change of heart after naming their children. Days, weeks, months, even years later, they wish they had named their kids something different and seek to change the child's name.

The other day, my kids reminded me of the dessert policy I instituted when they were young. They could choose to either have: 2 small items, like two cookies, or 8 M&M’s. Don’t ask me how I came up with this crazy formula. But I do remember firmly adhering to it and except on special occasions they knew never to even ask for special dispensation.

When they were too young to know any differently, there were no sweets or junk food in our house, at least not for them. As they got old enough to know better, I declared that complete abstinence would create cookie monsters, so “that food” became permissible but only in a natural, controlled rhythm. I do admit to sometimes finding empty candy wrappers and chip bags under couch cushions and under beds, but I allowed these digressions to pass without confrontation. I attributed it to youthful spunkiness and small acts of rebellion - allowing the guilty parties to believe that they had gotten away with something. Instead, maybe it should have been my wake up call.

In case you missed it, we were nominated for a Bloggers Choice Award. Thank you, Melissa, and all who have voted!

Here is an award I do not want to be nominated for: Parenting magazine just released its mean-spirited -- but guilty pleasure reading -- the annual "Stinky Diaper Awards". While many of this year’s award recipients deserve the bad rap, I actually felt bad that Britney was called out as No. 1. Surely, there are worse offenders and can we leave this poor girl’s parenting alone?

I nominate Lori Drew, although the parents of Riley Ann Sawyers are pretty vile, too.

Without further ado, Parenting's other six recipients of the Stinky Diaper Awards are the following:

2.) Virgie Arthur, Anna Nicole Smith’s mother, for being a money-grubber. As proof, Parenting listed some photographs she sold to the paparazzi for $12,000, which in the grand scheme of things, is not a lot of money. I thought Parenting’s case was weak. The woman lost her daughter. Let’s show her a little more compassion.

3.) Women who schedule non-emergency c-sections. Clearly this is a risky trend started by the celebs, but I am surprised the magazine went there. Rawr!

4.) Bill Maher for his sexist breastfeeding comments. With the apt title of "Bigger Boob Than Ever award" -- this is apparently his second nomination -- I would have placed him higher on my list.

5.) Charlize Theron for this comment: "Getting pregnant doesn’t excite me," Theron told Parade magazine. "I don’t really want to look like a whale." This did not even register on my radar screen. Surely, there are worse offenders. Paging Lori Drew...