A recent story in Newsweek highlighted an unfortunate -- but predictable -- side effect of China's draconian one child policy: Many elderly people are alone and they have no one to care for them.

Family is the bedrock of Chinese society, at least in theory. But three decades of gut-wrenching change are testing those old bonds. More kids than ever are leaving their hometowns—even the country—in search of jobs. This generation is the first to grow up under the one-child policy, rolled out in 1979. They are "more likely to be spoiled and self-centered," says demographics expert Cai Feng. "As adults, children of this generation lack the inclination to support their parents." Forty-two percent of Chinese families in 2005 consisted of an old couple living alone, according to the National Bureau of Statistics.

That's causing even young parents to rethink the meaning of family in China. For centuries a healthy brood of boys was considered the best form of social security. That's still generally true in the countryside; farmers prefer sons who can work in the fields over a daughter whose earning potential—if any—is transferred to her husband's family. But in China's cities, many young couples now say they prize daughters over sons for their loyalty. "Urban couples all think girls are much better than boys. Girls are more thoughtful, especially towards their parents," says Feng Xiaotian, a sociology professor at Nanjing University who has conducted surveys of Chinese families. In a recent China Youth Daily poll, respondents who preferred a daughter (29 percent) edged out those who wanted a son (28.4 percent).

To avoid loneliness, or even worse, a nursing home -- still considered shameful in Chinese society -- many elderly Chinese are "adopting" adult women as their daughters. Young, wealthy urbanites are breaking the one-child policy by having more children and paying a fine. They are also having more children through loopholes in the policy such as bearing children in another country or saying that their older children are handicapped. In the most extreme cases, men are having children by different women.

The Chinese government has no safety net for so many elderly people so it is encouraging youth to take care of their parents. "The Education Ministry has supported a resurgence of Confucian studies, which promote respect for elders," the Newsweek article stated.

This topic resonates with me as I have always been conflicted by culture clash; the American ideal of rugged individualism and the more communal attitude I was raised with by a Latino family. Like the Chinese, there are deep cultural biases against nursing homes among Latinos. My grandmother, whose mental capacities worsen by the day due to Alzheimer's, lives with my parents.

But what do you do if you live far from your family? How should the Chinese deal with this aging crisis?