Mother Talkers

'Supernanny' Addresses Common Parenting Woes

Fri May 09, 2008 at 07:59:32 AM PDT

Jo Frost, "Supernanny from the hit ABC show, just answered Washington Post reader questions on everything from potty-training to discipline. Here is a sample:

Minneapolis, Minn.: Hi Jo -

I have a just-over-three-year-old boy who is not yet potty trained. I have tried everything I have read about in books ('potty prizes', encouragement, positive rewards, special underpants, praise, stickers...) to encourage him to use the potty but he is just not interested! I feel like he is ready and capable of using the potty - and we had a streak over Christmas when he actually was using it, but then stopped. Should we keep trying (and if so, what do we do next?) or should we back off for awhile?

Jo Frost: He's more than capable of being potty trained. However you have played and toyed with the idea and he has half-heartedly done so. You need to make up your mind one way or another (and the answer should be yes). Number one: take note of his fluid intake. 2: take him completely out of diapers, no half-measures. 3: Diapers only at bedtime. 4: you will need to spend a week doing this - stay local, no big trips. You can find a step by step guide in my first Supernanny book...

Arlington, Va.: Hi, Ms. Frost!

We are new parents to a 7-month old, and I am wondering about how best to incorporate a routine into our day. Specifically, our baby isn't a great sleeper and doesn't have set napping times. She'll usually take a 1 to 2 hour nap in the morning, but we have trouble getting her to sleep in the afternoon. And we always get her to sleep by walking her in the stroller, as she will cry if we put her down in her crib. Do you have any tips on starting a baby on a routine?

Jo Frost: She should be taking a midmorning nap and then one straight after lunch. Creating a framework is going to be key for her. She may doze off around 5 for half an hour. Not until her eating schedule is in hand should you implement the sleeping technique. In my new book I detail my "controlled crying" technique. In short - Put the baby in the crib, go out, the baby will cry, you go in and say shh and rub the tummy... repeat, doubling the time in between.

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She also answered questions about the show:

Woodbridge, Va.: Jo - I often think that the out of control children are acting up for the cameras because they know what is expected of them. Do they know why their family is being filmed?

Jo Frost: The older children know that I come in to help but they don't really know what that means. Some parents have told the kids that Supernanny is coming to stop the naughty behavior. The kids are not playing to the camera. What you see is what you get. Kids are kids!

I loved her responses to these readers, including the latter mom with the superiority complex:

Charlotte, N.C.: Doesn't it frustrate you to see how poorly some parents "parent?" I work in an early childhood field and it makes me so angry sometimes when parents don't take the time to understand their child's development or to discipline them -- leading to problems later in life and in some cases, the parents just giving up. I really feel like parenting classes should be a mandatory thing for all people expecting kids. Thoughts?

Jo Frost: I don't believe in a "nanny state." But I do believe in parents stepping up and taking responsibility to recognize priorities that need to be in place when it comes to raising their children. "Family values" have declined over the years and there is an unhealthy level of disrespect. There are certainly times you see me on the show frustrated or sad. But it's always important to recognize that some parents just didn't know...

Hudson valley, NY: What I get from your show is a sense of tremendous gratitude that things were never so bad in my house! I'm appalled by how some parents are utterly ruled by their children and have no sense of how to set limits. Children thrive within limits that are reasonable and understandable. It makes them feel safe, and cared for. I've made lots of blunders as a Mom and your show, in a funny way, makes me feel more competent.

Jo Frost: Let's hope through our competence that we find enough compassion and empathy to spread our knowledge and help those who are struggling more.

Amen!

Tags: Supernanny, Washington Post, Jo Frost, ABC show (all tags)

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