Thankfully, this is an area I have no personal experience, but a recent writer to Berkeley Parents Network sought advice on how to explain her family's history of depression and suicide to her daughters.

My husband and I both have a family history of depression and suicide. My older brother (age 19), my husband's mother (age 42), and my grandfather--long before I was born--(50-ish?) all took their own lives. Our daughters, ages 6 and 10, don't know about this yet. They have asked questions from time to time about my brother's death (they have seen his pictures) and my husband's mother (they love his father's current wife, their Grandma). So far, we have only explained that they died from illness, and didn't go any further than that. How and when do we explain suicide to our daughters? I should mention that our daughters are both adopted, so our family's mental illness is not part of their health history. Our 10-year-old daughter in particularly is extremely sensitive, and doesn't like to hear sad and painful stories. But we don't want to keep "secrets" (my own family did that when my brother died, telling lies--and asking us to tell lies--about his death to all our close relatives and friends, including many of my siblings who did not find out for years). My grandfather's suicide was always a secret, and would have remained a secret -- until one of my siblings found a death certificate with suspicious language. What do you think -- when is the right time, and how to talk about it?
--Still grieving after 35 years

The BPN moderator offered a link to a previous discussion and the advice seemed sound. Most people who responded recommended the mother seek professional advice on how to broach the topic with her children and help them cope with both the information and possible mental illness. All of them said she should tell her children who may blame themselves for the death of a loved one or, when they are older, feel resentful for being left in the dark. Also, secrecy only intensifies the stigma of suicide, at least one reader said.

I know this is a sensitive topic, but what pieces of advice would you offer this mother? At what age is it appropriate to tell a child?