Body Hair and High Heels UPDATE
Thu Aug 02, 2007 at 08:39:53 AM PDT
UPDATE: So I ended up trimming my armpit hair substantially, and I really doubt anyone noticed. (It was horrendously hot so I passed on the shawl idea, but I'll remember it for next time.) I also found that with the length of the dress I was wearing, my shoes were barely visible, so I went with the comfy sandals. The whole event was over so fast I couldn't believe how much time I had spent worrying it about. Thanks for all the advice!
I'm attending a wedding this weekend which should be a lot of fun, but I'm already feeling stressed about it. I really, really hate getting dressed up. I have ever since I was a little kid. I didn't even have a wedding myself, partially because the thought of getting dressed up and having everyone looking at me was too stressful.
I consider myself pretty low maintenance, and I make a point not to do things to my body just because I'm supposed to. So I don't own any make up, nail polish, or even jewelry. I also don't shave... at all. This has been a very gradual development with lots of self doubt and insecurity involved, but I'm generally pretty OK with it now. Until I have to go to a wedding, that is.
I gave up shaving my legs a few years ago, and my armpits more recently. I hated shaving and it used to give me rashes, so I couldn't think of any good reason to continue. I couldn't stand the stubbly feeling in between shaving, and didn't want to shave daily, so I just stopped. I still have such conflicted feelings about my body hair. I know that my body grows hair and I don't see any reason to cover it up. I also did some research and found that women started shaving in this country when the razor markets decided they needed a new audience and started an ad campaign convincing women they should shave (which obviously worked pretty well). In some ways, I also see my body hair as a statement. It's something that if people see more often, it will be more normal, and women will feel more comfortable deciding not to shave. I still haven't worn a tank top in public since I stopped shaving my armpits, though, so I'm not as comfortable with it as I appear.
This wedding I'm attending is black tie, and I have a sleeveless dress (which I borrowed, since I can't stand dress shopping). I'm really having a hard time deciding what to do about my armpit hair. I just feel ridiculous enough in a dress to start with, and hairy armpits with a fancy dress just seems wrong somehow. It also feels wrong to shave my armpits for this event, since I hate shaving, would have a rash for weeks afterwards, and would feel like a hypocrite for shaving for a special event.
As if this hairy dilemma weren't enough, I also need to decide which shoes to wear. I have a very simple, very plain pair of black sandals that I've worn to the past few weddings. I definitely feel like I'm dressing down, but with a sundress I think they're OK. I'm not sure if they're acceptable for a black tie wedding with a fancier dress. I ordered a pair of shoes with heels thinking I would wear them, but since I'm not used to wearing heels, they're really not comfortable. The thought of buying another pair of shoes before the wedding makes me feel queasy, so please don't suggest that. Again, I'm forced to decide between being comfortable and doing what seems natural to me, and conforming to values that I don't agree with.
I'm desperate for advice, so please share any thoughts.
