Mother Talkers :: Rants and Raves on Modern Motherhood

Hello, my name is SandraB

by sandrab

Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 02:47:10 PM PDT

I’ve been lurking for several months, and have been posting comments for the past few days, but today I realized that I haven’t quite introduced myself, so here it goes.

I am a childhood friend of Erika; we found each other on the internet a few months ago. She and I went to Middle School together (we used to call it Jr. High back then). After almost 20 years, we’ve come to realize that we have more than the past in common. Big "up’s" to the internet!

I am a mother of two: Dominic just turned 4 and Mia turned 2 last month. I have been together with their dad for 7 years. We aren’t married just yet, but maybe this year. For some reason we keep finding more responsible things to do with our money (i.e. fix our home or pay off our cars). Every year around New Years we always talk about it and say, "Maybe this year." Although I own my own company, it feels very much like I am a stay at home mom. I’m blessed that I get to spend so much time with my kids. Dominic and Mia both go to pre-school three days a week because I think it’s important for them and for me as well.

sandrab's diary :: ::

When I was 18 I used to volunteer for the local YWCA’s Rape Crisis Center. I was the youngest amongst a bunch of very enlightened twenty-something’s and thirty-something’s. I became a regular baby sitter to the program director, who was a brilliant feminist, mother of two wonderful little girls, and happened to be lesbian. My first exposure to girl power at it’s best. Those were some really great learning years for me, it’s where I realized that I was a Feminist and very proud of it. I’ll admit to having gone a little over board (stopped shaving my legs and everything!), but eventually found my center. I’m a smart sexy Feminist Latina (bet you never heard those words in the same sentence).I can’t wait to take Dominic and Mia to their first Take Back the Night Rally! The reason I bring up this experience is because you all remind me of the wonderful women I came across 14 years ago. MT’s feels like home. Especially because I live in a very conservative community; I’m surprised I haven’t been booted out of town!

I look forward to reading your stories every day. A huge thanks to Erika for sending me the link to MT’s!

Tags: Introduction (all tags)

Hi, Sandra (0 / 0)

thanks for the intro! I love hearing from new people.

by Rachel on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 02:49:52 PM PDT
Smart Sexy Feminist Latina (0 / 0)

Hey, I personally know a few people that would describe, me included. I envision a t-shirt. ;-)

I'm so glad you delurked and introduced yourself! I LOVE taking credit for bringing brilliant women into the fold. :-)

by Erika on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 02:57:28 PM PDT
- you are right (0 / 0)
  
  that does describe you, and Gloria for that matter (who I briefly met at Maya's party). A t-shirt sounds like a good idea. :)
  
  by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 03:03:57 PM PDT
  
  [ Parent ]
  - Hee, hee!! (0 / 0)
    
    You both took the words right out of my mouth. :)
    
    Sandra, when I read you say (bet you haven't heard those words in a sentence together), I (loudly) said "HEY!!"
    
    Glad you de-lurked, and it was great meeting you at Maya's party. (Too bad you went all the way to Irvine!!) :)
    
    by gloria on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 03:18:33 PM PDT
    
    [ Parent ]
    - That's Me (0 / 0)
      
      in a nut shell. Things like the Irvine incident happen to me all the time. Never a dull moment, even on the way to celebrate a birthday!
      
      by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 06:06:33 PM PDT
      
      [ Parent ]
- Yes... (0 / 0)
  
  that is a t-shirt I would wear! There are a lot of us on this site. :)
  
  by Elisa on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 05:20:18 PM PDT
  
  [ Parent ]
  - hhhmmm... (0 / 0)
    
    Here's a little something I whipped up. What do y'all think? Different shirt style? Font? If there's interest, I can post it for sale. :-)
    
    by Erika on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 08:03:05 PM PDT
    
    [ Parent ]
    - Erikita! (0 / 0)
      
      That's why you rule. Already designing the shirt and ready to sell! Love that. I wasn't able to view it, can I have directions for dummies please?
      
      by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 09:00:40 PM PDT
      
      [ Parent ]
      - let's try this (0 / 0)
        
        Here it is! What do you think?
        
        by Erika on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 09:33:41 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        I LOVE it!!! (0 / 0)
        
        n/t
        
        by gloria on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 10:50:32 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        cute (0 / 0)
        
        shame I simply don't qualify or I'd buy one too!
        
        by Rachel on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 11:37:00 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        could always make a more general one (0 / 0)
        
        Smart. Sexy. Feminist. WOMAN.
        
        or...
        
        Smart. Sexy. Feminist. MOMMY.
        
        don't mind me...I just love message tees. :-)
        
        by Erika on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 11:40:07 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        hmmm (0 / 0)
        
        I'll have to think of which one?!
        
        by Rachel on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 11:40:58 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        How about (0 / 0)
        
        just Smart. Sexy. Feminist. No need for qualifiers imo.
        
        The font is awesome! You are amazing...
        
        by GiGi on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 06:17:26 AM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        How about (0 / 0)
        
        Smart. Sexy. Feminist. Mothertalker. ?!?!?!?
        
        :)
        
        by gloria on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 06:24:59 AM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        Mothertalker! (0 / 0)
        
        Love it! Logo on the back?
        
        by GiGi on Thu Jan 31, 2008 at 04:58:36 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
        
        the back... (0 / 0)
        
        can just say the URL...
        
        www.mothertalkers.com
        
        I love it!
        
        by Erika on Thu Jan 31, 2008 at 05:13:55 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
    - I'd have to talk to... (0 / 0)
      
      Lorrie, who handles our t-shirt sales. They own the rights to the store. But I like the idea!
      
      by Elisa on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 05:58:16 AM PDT
      
      [ Parent ]
Oh yes! (0 / 0)

Actually "feminist" & "Latina" sound great together - I do not think you are as rare as you imply (except maybe in your town). THANK YOU for de-lurking! I am also an ex take back the night person and agree it is wonderful to be raising the next generation of activists.

The most important lesson I learned from my own mom was from watching her juggle all the things she had to do - taking care of us vs. her work vs. community stuff - while remaining a real person - and now you are doing that for Dominic and Mia!

DstepD14 does not listen to much that I say, but I think picks up things from watching me, so the only way to influence her is to change myself. Bleagh! Isn't there a shortcut? (laughs madly)

by madwoman in the attic on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 03:10:09 PM PDT
- Did I mention (0 / 0)
  
  I am also step-mom three times over? DH? hmmm, don't quite know what to call him... DR (his first initial) has three children from his first marriage. Two of the three lived with us until recently; the eldest just moved out and joined the service. I enjoy being a step-mom, but it isn't easy. Sometimes it seems that no matter what you do or say, it's the wrong thing. I'm sure your DstepD is listening AND watching, even if she won't admit it.
  
  by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 06:10:57 PM PDT
  
  [ Parent ]
  - Welcome SandraB (0 / 0)
    
    How about DP for darling partner? Or is that not romantic enough? I was thinking darling sweetheart, but DS already goes to the boy babies, so, no go there.
    
    by cynmill on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 10:23:18 PM PDT
    
    [ Parent ]
    - SO??? (0 / 0)
      
      I have seen SO used, for Significant Other...
      
      by Erika on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 10:38:58 PM PDT
      
      [ Parent ]
Howdy! (0 / 0)

...and welcome to MT. My kids are 5 and 1 (close to yours), and this place is fantastic for insight, experience, and bouncing ideas. It's a good place.

by tarantula on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 04:11:38 PM PDT
Welcome, Sandra! (0 / 0)

I have enjoyed your contributions. When you wrote you were a "smart sexy feminist Latina," I knew we were sisters! ;-)

Thanks for de-lurking.

by Elisa on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 05:19:25 PM PDT
- Hermana! (0 / 0)
  
  I'm so glad you can all relate to the SSFL! I am a rarity in my town, which sometimes makes me feel so isolated, but am so glad to hear that I'm not in the minority hear.
  
  Thanks everyone for your warm welcome.
  
  by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 06:13:35 PM PDT
  
  [ Parent ]
  - ...I meant to say (0 / 0)
    
    "here".
    
    by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 06:20:02 PM PDT
    
    [ Parent ]
Hi, SandraB (0 / 0)

Looking forward to your input!

by coobert on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 06:17:42 PM PDT
BTW (0 / 0)

you say you own your own company - what industry? What do you do? I love hearing about other parents that work from home and are entrepreneurs!

by Rachel on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 06:45:00 PM PDT
- I do a little (0 / 0)
  
  of everything.
  
  I own a company called "A to Z Notary Services". It's really myself and a handful of friends that happen to be notaries. It's a fun job, I get to meet lot's of different people.
  
  DR (Dear Romeo) and I also own a Bail Bond Company. I know what some of you might be thinking, only because I get it all the time. The job is not as awful as it sounds. Before I knew anything about bail, my impression was that bail "bondsman" would let out a bunch of criminals. The reality of the job is a lot different; for our company anyway. We deal with a lot of great families whose children (of all ages) get themselves into trouble. There are certain offenses we will not touch, like sex offenders, rapists, anything in that realm. Surprisingly, it's very rewarding work (sounds crazy, ha?).
  
  I also do work on the side as a translator. I'm currently in the process of becoming certified so that I can officially work for hospitals and courts.
  
  by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 08:56:34 PM PDT
  
  [ Parent ]
  - very interesting (0 / 0)
    
    I'm agnostic on the subject of bail bonding; it's a function under the US legal system, and as it exists, it might as well be done properly/legally/ethically.
    
    But it sounds like you've got a lot of coverage of the legal system from soup to nuts. Fascinating!
    
    I'm a freelance financial journalist (mostly writing about institutional investing). I'm based in Melbourne, Australia and cover Australia, but also keep up with the US, Europe and parts of South American and Asia. Helps that I love language! One of these days, after finishing with having young'uns (one so far, Jessica, 2 1/2), I'd love to pick up an Asian language, and better still, do it by moving overseas again.
    
    by Rachel on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 09:06:08 PM PDT
    
    [ Parent ]
    - You sound (0 / 0)
      
      fascinating! I have never visited Australia, but my sister has many times, and she loves it. How many more children are you planning on having? I used to want 4 to 6... but after two I changed my mind very quickly.
      I would love to be able to raise my kids in different countries. My dream is to live in Italy every summer until they get into high school... can't quite figure out how to get the money or talk my SO into it!
      
      by sandrab on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 09:25:45 PM PDT
      
      [ Parent ]
      - looking for number 2 (0 / 0)
        
        Number 2 is "work in progress" as they say. We'll see after that; I think I'd be happy with two bio kids, DH still talks about three...
        
        by Rachel on Thu Jan 31, 2008 at 06:48:52 PM PDT
        
        [ Parent ]
- And (0 / 0)
  
  what do you do? I forgot to ask.
  
  by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 08:57:15 PM PDT
  
  [ Parent ]
Welcome! (0 / 0)

Glad you are here and thanks for introducing yourself!

and, yeah, is the internet ever great! I got reconnected with one of my best friends from HS. Found her on the internet in Dec. 2001 and we email about once a week. Have not made it to NYC to see her IRL yet but that's gonna have to happen before long.

by Lisa in Austin on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 07:29:29 PM PDT
- I was very (0 / 0)
  
  excited to find Erika. I'd thought of her often and wondered what ever happened. By finding her, I found at least 12 other people from the same middle school that I had not seen in 20 years. 2007 was a great year for me in terms of reconnecting with old friends.
  
  by sandrab on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 09:03:50 PM PDT
  
  [ Parent ]
Nice to meet you... (0 / 0)

I love it when new people come in and unlurk! :)

"If it's not Scottish, it's crap!" ~Mike Meyers

by 1plain1peanut on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 10:21:42 AM PDT
Hi Sandra (0 / 0)

Welcome again. Good to have you here!

by SwissClogs on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 01:43:33 PM PDT
Leg shaving is over-rated... (0 / 0)

Haven't done mine since, oh, about 1988! :-)

Welcome!

by AnnieJo on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 01:54:59 PM PDT

Permalink | 38 comments

Hello, my name is SandraB

by sandrab

Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 02:47:10 PM PDT

Daily Kos Help

Hi, Sandra (0 / 0)

Smart Sexy Feminist Latina (0 / 0)

you are right (0 / 0)

Hee, hee!! (0 / 0)

That's Me (0 / 0)

Yes... (0 / 0)

hhhmmm... (0 / 0)

Erikita! (0 / 0)

let's try this (0 / 0)

I LOVE it!!! (0 / 0)

cute (0 / 0)

could always make a more general one (0 / 0)

hmmm (0 / 0)

How about (0 / 0)

How about (0 / 0)

Mothertalker! (0 / 0)

the back... (0 / 0)

I'd have to talk to... (0 / 0)

Oh yes! (0 / 0)

Did I mention (0 / 0)

Welcome SandraB (0 / 0)

SO??? (0 / 0)

Howdy! (0 / 0)

Welcome, Sandra! (0 / 0)

Hermana! (0 / 0)

...I meant to say (0 / 0)

Hi, SandraB (0 / 0)

BTW (0 / 0)

I do a little (0 / 0)

very interesting (0 / 0)

You sound (0 / 0)

looking for number 2 (0 / 0)

And (0 / 0)

Welcome! (0 / 0)

I was very (0 / 0)

Nice to meet you... (0 / 0)

Hi Sandra (0 / 0)

Leg shaving is over-rated... (0 / 0)

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