Mother Talkers

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  • Tend to agree, (0 / 0)

    but maybe the point (not really brought out at the link :) ) is that the different "types" of learners may need different teaching strategies to satisfy their needs. (?)

    I have an acquaintance who brings this up with regard to the GATE program.  (She has 2 kids in it.)  She feels GATE should be a magnet program just for the gifted who really don't fit in a regular classroom but that it mostly ends up serving the high achieving students who would do fine in a regular classroom if only the regular classroom were doing a better job with differentiation of instruction.

    Katherine, mom to two boys 7/00 and 1/04

    by pat of butter in a sea of grits on Mon Jul 07, 2008 at 11:36:12 AM PDT

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    • yes yes yes (0 / 0)

      which is why NCLB is such a failure. It assumes all kids learn the same way. What a shame.

      by lilianna28 on Mon Jul 07, 2008 at 11:42:00 AM PDT

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    • and one problem I have (0 / 0)

      is that I feel guilty about complaining about this since my kids are overall doing fine in school. I mean, I feel like parents whose kids are really struggling because of learning disabilities "deserve" to complain more than I do.

      does that make sense?

      Mom of twins, DD and DS, born 12/96

      by Lisa in Austin on Mon Jul 07, 2008 at 01:02:10 PM PDT

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      • I say don't feel guilty (0 / 0)

        I know lots of parents who are frustrated because they are told their kids are super-bright, and their kids don't perform.  And, the kids don't receive any school services, and parents are left wondering, What am I supposed to do?  Should I let them be mediocre when they are capable of more?

        And often, there are social/emotional issues that go along with giftedness that can create problems for the child at school, and for the family at home, like meltdowns in kids who are "too old" for them.  

        Mama to one son, born 12/93.

        by mamacita on Mon Jul 07, 2008 at 08:02:41 PM PDT

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        • been there (0 / 0)

          like meltdowns in kids who are "too old" for them.

           

          my DD is just now [going into 6th grade] learning to control her frustration when something is hard for her. She has it so easy with most things [study 10 minutes for a test and make a 96] that when she doesn't understand, it is very frustrating for her. That is exactly the thing I would expect a talented/gifted teacher to "get", but some of them don't.

          Mom of twins, DD and DS, born 12/96

          by Lisa in Austin on Mon Jul 07, 2008 at 09:04:14 PM PDT

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          • I still remember the first time.. (0 / 0)

            ..I didn't know how to do a math problem. I was 15. And it was terrifying to me - the experience is still seared into my memory. To look at this problem and not know how to do it. It had been instinctive for so long, this inherent understanding really not much different to speaking, I could just do it. But teachers really didn't know how to deal with that, and when I spoke to the teacher afterwards, he just didn't get it. Like the answer was "well, study and learn it next time." Well, sure, easy to say, but how when you've never needed to before and don't even know how to go about it?
            I suspect part of the problem is that with the gifted kids, they also learn in different ways, and finding how to create the understanding to move on can be tough.

            "You're never more alone than when you're alone in a crowd."

            by Expat Briton on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 08:58:41 AM PDT

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            • so interesting (0 / 0)

              Thanks for this insight.

              I notice a level of panic in some meltdowns I've witnessed.  I wonder if this is why -- the terror you describe.  I can imagine how hard it must be to be told to "learn" when all along you've easily intuited.

              For the parents, the meltdowns are sometimes mystifying.  Like, why was it okay for you to use the blue glass yesterday, and today when I offer it to you, you go into orbit?  My hunch has been that it has to do with order or predictability?  Or that there's some high-level patterning going on, and the blue glass suddenly violates that?  It seems that the world is being processed in a different way and maybe what's behind some of the frustration is the sense that the rest of us aren't getting it -- which could also be pretty scary for a kid.  Which makes me wonder if it's easier for a gifted parent to raise a gifted kid?

              Mama to one son, born 12/93.

              by mamacita on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 09:46:01 AM PDT

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            • first (and only) time (0 / 0)

              I failed a test. 7th grade. I had been sick, I didn't realize how much information I actual did learn from being in class and like a dummy I thought I could take it and be fine., since i never studied anyway. I FAILED. and I. freaked. I broke down, almost hysterical screaming crying, begging to take it over, just all over the place and I still remember the horrified look my "honors" teacher gave me as she stepped over me and scurried out of the room, like i was some crazy thing to sweep away. I picked myself up and left and took the F. Ugh

              by lilianna28 on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 09:56:56 AM PDT

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        • Interesting (0 / 0)

          often, there are social/emotional issues that go along with giftedness that can create problems for the child at school, and for the family at home, like meltdowns in kids who are "too old" for them.  

          We have this issue with my older son (meltdowns still at age almost 8).  I'm interested in this comment, if this is a common thing among gifted children.  He is academically quite successful (particularly in reading/language arts, not so much in math) but I don't know if he's "gifted" or not.

          Katherine, mom to two boys 7/00 and 1/04

          by pat of butter in a sea of grits on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 08:24:14 AM PDT

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          • this is going to sound silly BUT (0 / 0)

            I was a comic book geek in high school. One of my favorite lines came from this comic where the X-Factor (#87 called X-Aminations, yes I am a dork and a half) where this one super arrogant, brilliant, socially inept and super-speed character named Quicksilver goes on this brilliant rant about why he is the way he is (and if I remember I'll type it all out when I get home and re-read  it because i must now that I'm thinking of it). The summary is basically this:

            Imagine how irritating it is when you're stuck behind someone at a atm who cannot seem to figure out the machine, can't get anything to work right and it's only seconds, or a minute of your life but it is so irritating. Imagine your entire life is like that?

            I think about gifted people when I think about that. School isn't fulfilling and doesn't help. No one "thinks" quite the way you think. It's stifling.

            I think the best you can do for people like that is allow them to follow their own path as best they can and try to teach coping techniques. Maybe. :) I was only partly gifted, so I coped ok.

            by lilianna28 on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 09:51:15 AM PDT

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            • X-FACTOR 87 (0 / 0)

              OMG, the most brilliant comic book EVER.  That was a stunning piece of work by Peter David!

              Mom to DD, 3yo, and DS, on the way (Sept 08)

              by tessajp on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 02:32:12 PM PDT

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              • you are my new hero (0 / 0)

                seriously. you are. my. hero

                by lilianna28 on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 03:38:51 PM PDT

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                • Heh heh. (0 / 0)

                  This is actually how my husband and I met, through our mutual interest in X-Men comic books.  I think we have multiple copies of this particular issue in our comic book boxes.  We haven't really kept up with it, but I just started reading the "Season 8" Buffy comic books Joss Whedon is writing.  I must say, I kinda like the new trend of bundling issues into tradepaperbacks because I always forget on a monthly basis to grab the latest issue!

                  And Quicksilver's explanation about the ATM machine rings SO TRUE, and it would be incredibly infuriating to live all day like that.  ARGH.

                  Mom to DD, 3yo, and DS, on the way (Sept 08)

                  by tessajp on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 05:15:23 PM PDT

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    • That's definitely true (0 / 0)

      the school system has a lot of problem with the truly gifted, finding a place for them and finding a way to harness their energy and creativity.

      Worse, some teachers feel threatened by highly gifted kids, and aren't always willing to work with their strengths.

      A friend of mine has an extremely gifted son, and he is in a magnet program for the highly gifted. These kids are all of the supergenius type - and so, the school has fantastic test scores. They constantly have to defend their school against parents who want their more ordinary kids to go there - figuring that their kids will get fantastic test scores if they're mixed in. They have a hard time explaining why the highly gifted kids are special needs and really don't fit well with the other kids, and really thrive together in a small group.

      by shenanigans on Mon Jul 07, 2008 at 03:00:49 PM PDT

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