i definitely paid lots of attention to attachment when they were small b/c before i adopted my two eldest, i was a foster mom to a little girl with reactive attachment disorder.  that was by leaps and bounds and millions of miles, the most difficult thing i've ever dealt with.  i teach about bonding and attachment in my child development courses, and always tell stories about which one of my kids fits into which category.  oddly enough, dc fits into "secure".  

and yes, i am not pro-or anti-label... i just would love to know where to turn to for advice/strategies, though i am starting to realize it doesn't matter what, if anything, we can call this.. the strategies will likely remain the same.  and mama has to relax and reframe.  i know i'd be better at reframing WITH a label, but that makes no sense at all.