72 years old, so definitely of the generation that had few choices. And a very similar, unhappy, argumentative, critical disposition. I have often heard the same types of criticisms of what my children lack.  But, to her credit (?) she tears down other people's children even more unmercifully and hurtfully. I'm glad I don't hear what she says behind my back.

I find it very interesting that she was a very well-respected, liked, desirable (requested!) teacher and that, of course, none of these people knew that she would go home and drink herself drunk. Every. Day. Still does, starting at 3:00 or so. She weighs about 120 lbs. and drinks a bottle of wine (or more?) every day. And she's a nasty drunk. She'll follow my DH around the house to seek out and keep and argument going. It would be comical if it wasn't so sad.

minnmom, you are so right to keep your DS off limits to her nastiness. A couple of years ago I was at a restaurant with MIL, DH, DD and DS. MIL started blaming DD (then 9) for not having a good time at MIL's house "because you didn't give me any ideas of what to do". WTF? She's the KID! DD, who's usually very calm started to cry that heartbreaky cry. I got up, took DD, and went home. I made a "scene", oh horrors for MIL! MIL almost left our house that night but didn't. However, she hasn't started in on the kids since then. I felt like a huge weight came off my shoulders that night. (I'm generally very meek, though I'm getting better as I get older. And even the meekest Mom can become Mama Bear, right?)

I've got her for Thanksgiving this year, too, my thoughts will be with you!