Mother Talkers

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  • See but "help" is one thing (0 / 0)

    and doing the whole project for the kid is another.  We do go over stuff and practise facts and make suggestions when they're working but I'm so not doing their project for them.  I don't feel the stories about mom being up all night building the diorama for junior is cute at all.  I'm prepared to help with time management for projects and drive to the library and suggest things but I'm so not doing the project.  

    If it's a game then I don't want to play.  I want them to do it themselves and be proud of good quality grade 2 or grade 4 work.  I want it to be their best and not my best.   But maybe I'm a freak...

    Mother of one girl(3/98)and two boys(5/00) & (5/03) and general pain in the arse.

    by lonestar canuck on Thu Oct 04, 2007 at 12:21:31 PM PDT

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    • no, you're not a freak (0 / 0)

      You're just a mom who wants her kids to take their accomplishments (and their lumps) all for themselves.  Isn't that the way it's supposed to be?  Seeing the results of all your hard work (or not)?  It really bugs me to see parents take the pride out from under their kids by doing things for them.  And, yes, I realize that means my kid's not going to an Ivy League school.  Good thing I can live with that.  

      Where I live, I kid you not, parents hire architects and contractors to build their children's 4th grade mission project.  Something seriously wrong with that.  In one of the "good" districts, the teachers freely admit that their scores would not be so high if every single student in their honors and AP classes was not also receiving private tutoring.  Kind of makes it hard to figure out where "even playing field" begins and ends.

      Same thing happens in private schools, though.  A friend pulled her kids from the Armenian school because the teacher sent home work that she had not already taught.  So the homework wasn't practice, and the parents were the teachers.  

      Mama to one son, born 12/93.

      by mamacita on Thu Oct 04, 2007 at 12:47:05 PM PDT

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      • Even on a smaller scale I can find (0 / 0)

        if offensive.  I recall when one of my kids was in 3rd or 4th grade and was assigned a science project.   They had a list of choices, one being making a model of the solar system.  Ofcourse, I wanted my child to get a good grade, so I went to the craft store and forked out close to $50 for materials.  It occurred to me that kids were indeed being graded on their parents' ability to pay for such materials.  

        by tjb22 on Thu Oct 04, 2007 at 01:18:46 PM PDT

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        • Yes! (0 / 0)

          Those kits at Michael's can really add up!

          Mama to one son, born 12/93.

          by mamacita on Thu Oct 04, 2007 at 01:42:28 PM PDT

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          • They make kits? (0 / 0)

            And here I was traipsing around the store trying to find each individual item!  And those costs do add up...and it is very unfair to students who's parents cannot afford such luxuries.  

            by tjb22 on Thu Oct 04, 2007 at 01:49:32 PM PDT

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            • I did the same thing! (0 / 0)

              We traipsed up and down the aisle with my kids each picking out which styrafoam balls they wanted, and then while we were checking out, there was a guy behind us buying one of the kits. Oh well, I think it's a better learning experience if they had to figure out what relative size the planets should be [of course it was NOT to scale]

              Mom of twins, DD and DS, born 12/96

              by Lisa in Austin on Thu Oct 04, 2007 at 03:42:08 PM PDT

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              • we have hardly had to go to Michael's (0 / 0)

                but I have heard about those kits and I know lots of people use them.  A great deal for a capitalist to make it easier on the parent(s), for a price.

                Mama to one son, born 12/93.

                by mamacita on Thu Oct 04, 2007 at 04:25:48 PM PDT

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