Tuesday Open Thread

It’s Tuesday!

I survived Alex’s 3rd birthday party. We almost had no tables, chairs, jumper, churro machine and patio heater, as it was past noon and no delivery yet. I called and the rental company informed me they had CANCELED MY ORDER the night before because I never returned calls confirming my order. Clearly they were dialing a wrong number, but long story short ZOMG THEY DIDN’T DELIVER UNTIL 2 P.M. AND THE PARTY STARTED AT 3. Crisis (barely) averted.

Then . . . there was the cake. This bakery makes a cake with beautiful white chocolate curls all around the edges. I ordered custom fondant decorations from Etsy and planned to decorate the cake myself. So when I ordered the cake (in person), I asked for “Happy Birthday” to be written on a long piece of white chocolate, so I could move it around as necessary. The employee said, “OK, so you just want Happy Birthday written on the board?” Yes, I said.

So I go pick up the cake, already running late because of the tables and chairs snafu . . . and the cake literally says:

Happy Birthday

On the Board

I could not make that shit up if I tried.

I swear I could feel my face twitching. The girl looks at me and says, “Did anyone call you to double check this? ‘Cause it seemed kind of weird.”


“Can you fix it?!” I demanded. Sure, she said. In the interest of saving time, I asked her to just erase “On the Board.” I figured I could work with the “Happy Birthday” as is.

So I sit there stewing and steaming for a good 10 to 15 minutes, then they bring the cake back out and . . . it’s totally blank. No Happy Birthday, no anything. “I asked to keep the Happy Birthday!” I barked.

Five minutes later it comes back out with “Happy Birthday!” written off-center, crooked and with an exclamation point that I did not ask for.

At that point I just snatched up the cake and left. I went home and was ranting and raving to DH, who promptly burst out laughing. Yes, I admit in hindsight, the real life Cake Wreck was pretty funny. I just wish I’d had the presence of mind to snap a photo.

In any case, I salvaged it:

And he had a ridiculously good time. The party was worth every second of aggravation 😛

Have you experienced any similar disasters during a party/wedding/social event? Please share!

What else is up? Chat away!


55 thoughts on “Tuesday Open Thread

  1. Oh Erika, I know it was stressful in the moment, but that cake story is hilarious! I’d write Happy Birthday On The Board on every family birthday cake forever more!

    That stinks about the rental company though — not cool. I’d have been fuming about that, too. How did the churro machine work out?

    • The machine was OK. It was actually just a warmer, like the kind you see at Disneyland. Put the frozen churros in to cook on the bottom rack, kept them warmed on the top rack. But there was this timer that you pretty much had to keep going at all times, and I would lose track of it. But when they were warm, they sure were tasty!

    • SO not made up. Never in my wildest nightmares could I have come up with that scenario! I was mortified. I am still kind of mortified because I know I was shooting daggers at them with my eyes the whole time I was forced to wait there. But MAN, don’t mess with a mama like that on the day of her kid’s birthday party, amirite?! :)

  2. Closing on our house today! Yay! We did a walk thru last night and its so beautiful. We are closing a week early and I saw them loading up yesterday so it’s not quite as spic and span as the homeowner assured me, but no big deal. Just a little extra scrubbing. We just wanted to have the deal done and they agreed so that’s that.

    The kids are obsessed with sending things down the laundry chute. And they loved repeatedly slamming the French doors. Luckily we discovered a key to lock the doors shut. It’s a cool old house with lots of unique features that I sincerely hope my kids don’t break. Oh and the homeowners left a ton of furniture for us which is great, because our old house was so tiny that we were seriously lacking furniture! It will be ours today, I can’t wait!

  3. Remember the guy I was considering approaching about a guest blogging gig? The one who has a reputation as being integrity challenged, but who also has a very high profile? I mentioned something about being willing to do an occasional piece and he asked me to be a regular columnist. Gulp. It’s not paid (of course it’s not paid- why would I ever take on any work that WAS paid?) but it’s good visibility that could pay off.

    And I didn’t even have to take my tits out. So…there’s that.

  4. Erika, that is a hilarious story! Srsly bakery? I wish you had taken a picture of it 😛

    I don’t think I’ve actually had fondant although I’ve seen a lot of pictures of it. Does it taste good or mainly just for decoration?

  5. Well from the photos you posted on FB I never would have guessed there was any unnecessary stress to the party —

    Your rental story reminded me of the time I hired a sitter to go to a dermatologist appt [kids were 2 or 3] and when I got there I was informed the doctor wasn’t there that day. They called me to cancel the appointment but got a wrong number. Um…..what number did you call? They said a number that was one digit off from my number — clearly a typo when someone entered my number in the system. I said “that’s not my number, my number is X” and they said I must have written it wrong in my file. SERIOUSLY? I wrote it down wrong, the phone number I’ve had for 10 years, rather than you accidentally made a typo when you entered my phone number? Did they look me up in the phone book? Nope. Wow, I was SO steamed I took my kids when I went to the next appt. And of course they were angels and got complimented by all the staff on how well – behaved they were. Because they couldn’t reign hell on everything the one time I wanted them to act up.

    • The southern town where I used to live changed the name of the street where I used to live shortly after I had moved in and signed up for all my utilities. For about a year it was a total crapshoot whether or not I’d get my mail. And when I tried to call various places to change the street name, they’d give me varying levels of grief and red tape to go through. Because how often do street names just change? So, apparently my AT&T bills were all being returned to sender and I didn’t notice. One day, my phone was disconnected. I called from my office to find out what the deal was and they were like, “well, we sent you several notices and they got returned, so we were unable to contact you.” “But you are the PHONE COMPANY and you had my number! Why did you not call it?” The person on the other end kind of chuckled and said, “that’s not our policy, but that is kind of stupid.” Ya think? Thankfully, they let me pay the old bills and hooked up everything without extra fees, but sheesh!

    • Yup, the party company kept saying, “But you didn’t return our calls” like it was my bad. “What number did you call?” I asked. “I don’t have it on file because we erased your order when we canceled it.”


  6. My wedding rental company (tables, chairs, tablecloths), delivered and picked up everything, but did not get all the tablecloths for some reason. They chose not to arrive to pick up all their stuff until Monday, and the facility left them all in a pile in the corner. I was on my honeymoon and wasn’t there to supervise pickup, which they said they did this way all the time, nbd. The caterer looked and found a few of their tablecloths mixed in with her stuff, but not all of them. They charged me like $300 for all the tablecloths, which I refused to pay, so they took me to small claims court and I lost. Of course. The night of the wedding, the person with the venue (a museum on my university’s campus) tried to tell the caterer that the reception had to be cleaned up by 11pm, rather than the reception ending at 11 and cleanup done by 12am as agreed. Also, there was record heat and the AC at the reception hall didn’t work very well, so guests still refer to our wedding as Sweatfest 2000.

    This was our second caterer that we had to hire 2 months before the wedding after my first one stood my out of town parents and I up with no explanation or return call for 3 days afterwards. And let’s see, my florist didn’t order enough flowers for decorating the church and was late to almost all appointments. We also had to redo our order once with her because she misplaced it. AND the bead place where my bridesmaids and I were to make their necklaces and sip mimosas on the thursday before the wedding booked a group of girl scouts in the party room (which we found out when we arrived for our session). Oh, and the salon goofed and booked all my wedding party’s manicures on Saturday instead of after the luncheon on Friday. Thankfully, that one was caught when I went to put down a deposit two weeks before so I could scramble and find another place. This was all part and parcel of my experience living in a southern college town. Total incompetence of service people was the norm, but at least they were sweet and polite and had charming accents. It was constantly frustrating to live there, and had I given it more thought, I would not have had my wedding there.

    But at least my cake was right! That may have been about the only thing done right, and it was done by a New Jersey transplant.

    • I just realized that this is so ridiculous, it looks made up. Like I’m one of those people who goes on blogs with outlandish stories to get attention. Let me know if you need to talk to my mom, she’ll back me up.

      • After what I went through this weekend, I TOTES believe you. It was like the perfect storm of incompetence.

        I didn’t even tell y’all about the other disaster. I ordered these little chocolates with a picture of Alex on them to hand out as party favors. They were supposed to arrive last Wednesday, and nothing. I called Thursday morning (again, no contact at all from them) and was informed they were having a printer problem, but they would do their best to fix it and ship them out the same day. I asked them to please call me back to confirm they did, in fact, ship. You guessed it – no call.

        The next day they arrive and they look awful. Smudgy, blurry. And I paid a lot! So I call to complain only to be made to feel like they did me a favor – “We thought the quality was acceptable enough, and we thought it better that you have something rather than nothing.” I said had you communicated with me before the fact, I would have just canceled it. I asked for a refund and she said I would have to ship them back at my expense. That’s when the bag of doorknobs came out.

        I ended up keeping the chocolates and getting a full refund. Hmph.

  7. That cake story is awesome. I so would have left it. My family would never stop laughing at that. I’m glad you got all your deliveries!! What a heart attack. Not good for your stress level, poor dearie!!

  8. That cake story is awful, yet awesome. And Sweatfest 2000! Wow. Just …. wow. Y’all have some great stories. Seriously, E, how did you not go bananas that day?

    Once, friends got a cake for some occasion and on a whim asked for a smiley face written on it. When the staff person brought it back out, it literally had the words “Smiley Face” written on it.

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