Hey MTs! I need your help – your DH’s to be specific.
My DH says that it’s not that he doesn’t like my brothers, but that he thinks they don’t respect him. He says “I don’t spend time with people who don’t respect me” and that’s his reason for avoiding as many family gatherings with my brothers as he can. The latest is Thanksgiving, and we had our biggest fight in a long time over his refusal to go to my brother and sister-in-law’s house (and my subsequent white lies to both my brother and my mom). I”m hard pressed to see how a gracious invitation from my brother and sister-in-law to spend a fall weekend at their house in the Catskills could ever be construed as disrespect……..but I finally agreed we could stay home.
What the heck does he mean? I’ve asked him but he can’t or won’t really answer. Ask your DH or other man in your life – what does a guy mean when he thinks another guy respects or doesn’t respect him? As a “fixer”, I want to think that if I know what he’s talking about I can either keep an eye out for it, or talk to my folks or brothers about it. And it bugs me to have this amorphous concept (respect) without really knowing what it means.